I am allowing it because I haven't wanted to pressure her.
You've been doing what you are accusing her of doing. If you think it is/was in the better interest of the kids to have more of you, then you should be on that like a fly on sh*t regardless of DBing (some might disagree but I don't see how)...for you to go this long as is and then try to vie for my time because she wants a divorce seems disingenuous. Regardless if you believe it is better, check yourself, run it by a pro (not just us shmos here) and then act on it.
