Trying to save my M. W not really trying though.

[d1adsl5a]

You would be amazed how similar. We only lasted 3 sessions with the MC before she cancelled them. I also got that I married him because he was stable and a good provider, in other words, security. My wife too has yet to remember any good times. I have gotten that I am a great father and a good catch from her, but that is all.

Over the last five months, I have worked on all the things that she complained that were the reasons for her feelings:

-Worked too much(I was home by 6:30 every nite). I come home at 5:30 now.

-Didn't make lunches or do homework with the kids enough. I make lunches every night and do homework with all three kids each night now.

-I stopped wanting to go out alot. I had insomnia for the past year. Mainly because I knew something was wrong, didn't know what. Kept trying to get better for her, instead it got worse. Once the bomb was dropped, insomnia went away...Her idea of tough love didn't work. What if I had cancer--would she walk away then as well? During that time, I also sat on the couch too long after I got home from work. Mainly that was because it was two days since I had slept...

-I went to grad school and studied too much 9 years ago. When our kids were born, I never did the laundry.

-When she cancelled our cleaning lady(she was a stay at home mom) I said the toilets had mold in them a couple times and the sink had toothpaste all over. Look, I am a guy. I don't care if the house is dirty. But after three weeks, I made a couple stupid comments. Therefore, I now do laundry and I clean the bathrooms myself.

-All this has brought her self esteem to nothing over the years.

-When we argued, she would scream at the top of her lungs. Say things that would inflict as much pain on me. Run into our room and lock the door and wouldn't talk anymore. The next day, she would act as if everything was fine. I wasn't going to up pandora's box again--that pattern occured regularly every 9 months in our marriage. I will take fault on that as well. We did not communicate well.

Anyway, these are the main reasons she has given me for wanting out of our marriage.

I have made the changes, she has seen them and said you have made them. But why only with the threat of divorce?

It will be a battle to the end if we divorce who moves out of the house first...Rule number one, never leave your house I am told.

By the way: My wife goes out dressed to kill at least 1-2 nights a week and comes home at 3am.