I completely understand what everyone is saying here and frankly, in terms of communicating, I'm the one who's gone to therapy and read millions of books and articles about communicating with my H. Reading one now as a matter of fact.
My point is this....he last tells the lawyer he wants a divorce. Then does very little to let the lawyer know what we have decided to do...in the meantime, our lawyers have a chance meeting. My lawyer explains to his, "No, my client told me they were going to do nothing legally for the time being and since my client won't push for an answer that is an option for them." Then H's lawyer goes into a speech with absolute certainty that my H wants the D done and tells my lawyer to set a hearing date.
In speaking with H, his explanation was "Oh, I haven't had a chance to speak with my lawyer. I sent him an email today." And let's remember, I'm talking about the guy (my H) who filed and then didn't tell me for weeks and weeks. And then when he does, his answer was "Really, I'm not sure why I did it" referring to the actual filing.
And unfortunately, I've learned during this almost entire year, he says one thing to person A and a completely different thing to me. So it was very possible he told his lawyer to set a hearing even after telling me he wanted to work on things.
Sorry folks, the communication break down is not on my end. And today, I learned his lack of communication is not just with me. Oddly that does make me feel better on one hand, but not so much on the other.
It's amazing, you think you can't be surprised or sucker punched anymore....but you can be.
And believe me, had I done this, had it been the other way around where my lack of communication with my lawyer almost set a hearing in motion while he was on vacation....it would have been a much different and louder conversation.
