It's too hard sometimes

[TooLateForMe]

Had a misunderstanding where I assumed she was mad about "babysitting" my stuff in her apartment. I wanted to chew her out but chose to send a text apologizing. She called back to let me know that she wasn't even mad about my stuff in the apt. that we both assumed the other was mad. It just evolved organically into a very mature conversation.

She kind of brought it up as an aside that she was exhausted. That shows me she's thinking about the issues. I listened mostly and agreed with her. The fact that she was the one who guided the conversation contradicts her words about being over it all. She's thinking about it. I brought up the possibility of C which she shot down ("no more fight in me"). I justified her position.

It evolved from there to a great conversation about her efforts to improve her life and I complimented her. I told her these new changes in her personality were sexy. She appreciated that and said she wanted to be told things like that. Again, she's giving me a map. I just need to pay attention.

We talked about her job after that and I felt good just doing that. I tried to be involved in the conversation rather than just mumbling through it the way I used to. It felt good to connect so personally. If I keep this up, show changes (positive attitude, engagement, emotion, interest and affection) then I will hopefully make some progress.

She's showing me a very wounded and hardened heart. I have to appreciate her vulnerability now and show her love. I hope she will heal.

Sorry to hear about your sick D, hope she gets better soon. Bronchitis is nasty and it's terrible to have to listen to your child cough like that all night long.