My Intro: Thanks for Reading!

[billclay18]

OK Ben...no time like the present. My exW (who incidently had an EA, possible PA) wanted full custody, gave me the old "children belong with their mother" line, I was being vindictive, yada, yada, yada. The simple fact of the matter was I always an equal part of my D's life, possibly more so than my ex due to our schedules. There was simply no way I was going to settle for being a weekend dad. I argued the point for a bit, but realized I was wasting my time. Our lawyers agreed to let it go to mediation. After both making separate arguments to him, he told us we were both terrific parents, that our daughter would be fine with whomever the custodial parent was and STRONGLY advised we settle this ourselves because if we let it go to a judge, it go either way. Within two days we had an agreement in place for shared custody.

You've let your W know where you stand. She may be using what happened in the past to play on your guilt. Don't let it. You have a right to be just as big a part of your kid's life as she does. Don't discuss it with her again, you'll get nowhere. That being said though, be honest with yourself. Was your W a stay at home mom? Was she the primary caregiver? Can you live in close enough proximity to make this feasible? Can you live in your kid's school district? Talk to your lawyer, be honest with him and ask him to be honest with you about your chances of shared custody.

I'll share with you another time about exactly what my ex asked for in the D and what she got. I separated the emotional and business end of it, got the best possible outcome and must say I'm the poster boy for divorced dads.