RSF - thank you! That is well said. I did find inner peace for the first time in a while, so that is a success no matter what! Thanks for reminding me about the new R vs. the old R. H is trying to suck me into the old R - or even a new one that is far more negative - to justify his leaving. I can choose to not engage in that R.
DBD - I also wanted to let you know my H is very defensive and angry like your H. I think they are defending against knowing that what they are doing is hurtful and want to blame us instead of looking at their own behavior. Hopefully, separation and detachment (GIMA is great on this one) can leave them only looking at themselves.
H is coming home tonight after two peaceful nights without him. Gotta work the GAL and the detachment. I will look good (dying my hair today) and I will go out as soon as he arrives. I'm going to a support group and after that I will retreat to my room instead of sticking around the same room as H. This will be a 180 from my usual available behavior and will also be to protect myself from his anger should it return with a vengance.
