Hi JR, Rob and SB, I'm doing well. The pain kind of comes and goes - though it seems to be manageable right now. I started writing about it on my blog - since I found that I'm not going through a lot of stuff that others write about in their ACL repair blogs.
My mom was here for a week - which was wonderful. She helped me tremendously on the day of the surgery - and then made lots of great meals afterward...though it's hard to eat so much tasty (i.e. less-healthy) Peruvian food without being able to exercise.
The surgery left me in a complete daze for a couple days - and now the pain seems to wear me out a bit (I can't sleep through the night yet because of the brace) - but, all in all, I think it's going well. I had a good friend come into town to help me after my mom left. She'll be here for a few more days - and then I'll be on my own again.
As for STBX...her concern about my knee has mostly involved who will be picking up my baby boy from daycare. I told her that my mother and a friend would be helping me for the first couple weeks - and she made a fuss about not being comfortable with someone (i.e. my female friend) picking up my son - and asked to meet my friend. Since I don't trust her, I simply informed her that I would be in the car as well - and then she seemed dropped it.
I talk with my S13 almost everyday - and sometimes it's just so heartbreaking. He's doing great - already enjoying his new school, loving his new soccer team, and just making the most of his new environment. He tells me he misses us a lot - and he has cried a couple more times when talking on the phone - but we've been able to play chess and some other games online while using video and voice chat - which he tells his mom is almost like being in the same room with me.
On the personal front...I'm trying to get myself to write more. It occurred to me recently that I've never allowed my fiction/creative writing to be of value in and of itself - it's always been secondary to whatever else I've been doing in my life - more or less like a glorified hobby - and yet when I think about what I enjoy doing the most (work-wise) - it's writing...somehow this past year has put major obstacles between my imagination and the page - and so I'm working at finding a way to rid myself of those obstacles - which seems rooted in something deep inside of me...though which I just cannot yet understand for some reason.
That said, sometimes when I catalog this past year of my life, I just feel exhausted...and my mind just freezes...it's a terrible feeling - almost like I'm staring in shock at a Tsunami that is forever moving toward me while I stand on wet sand. I have to get over that - accept my life more fully for what it has been, and make the changes I have to make. I have to pull myself away from the mesmerizing force of that Tsunami - sometimes it's far too easy just to stop what I'm doing and stare at the messy memories of my life - and continue to rebuild.
