I'm sorry to hear about your stitch. It's not easy dealing with a w who only cares about themselves. Your lucky she's willing to go to Retroville. I asked my W and she was dead set against going. So good luck and God Bless you two with the retreat.
Here's what I can tell you about 5 years. It hurts everyday, even when you GAL. Somehow it gets turned around and you become the selfish one. Lately, I've been feeling more the physical pains of a bad relationship. There's this constant aching in the chest that lasts for hours and only goes away when you sleep. Then when you wake up it returns. For 5 years my dreams have been my only realtionship with W. I would sleep late during the weekends thinking it was better than getting my butt out of bed. I know I was a fool to base my life on dreams.
My advice is to GAL and make sure it doesn't take over your life.
