I want my family back!

[Calliope]

ok, so he dropped of the boys last night at 8. We always agreed that he'd have them till 8, but he used to have them at our house, and have them ready for bed by the time I got home. Now, he takes them to her house, and drives in the driveway at 8. It is really messing with their schedule, and its important to me to have them asleep by 8:30 so we have a good morning. Instead, they were so wound up that they didnt get to sleep until 10. So, while I was angry even thinking about it before they got home. I decided that I would say nothing, but then put it in an email, respectfully requesting a change in schedule. (either he does the bedtime routine with them and gets them in their beds by 8, or if he's not willing to do that, he can drop them off at 7:15 so that I can get them ready for bed.) It sucks for me, because this is the only free time that I have during the week (he picks them from daycare on Tues and Thurs..and I get out of work at 5). But its really important for the kids to stay with a routine. So I didn't bring it up, just started getting the boys ready for bed as soon as they got in. H said "I was hoping they'd fall asleep on the way". At one point, I did make a comment that my S was dirty and really needed a bath, and he said "I was wondering if I should give them a bath before I left" So I decided that if he was bringing it up, I'd say something. I just said, I'd really like to make some changes to the schedule if you arent going to get them ready for bed here like you used to. I know you've always had them till 8, but it was different when you had them here. He snapped back, "right, but now I take them to MY place". (her place). I stayed calm, and said, ok, we'll come up with something. He then again asked me about my medical stuff, and if I had my appt yet. I said no, and walked away to brush the boys teeth. He was saying bye to the boys, and I was giving him the cold shoulder (this is my problem, I have a hard time being happy around him, and I know I shouldnt show him my negative feelings.. .working on that!).. As he was leaving he said something about how he has drill next weekend and can't take the boys, and I said I know, and that he has the wedding in ohio 2 weeks later. His family lives there, and I told him a while ago that he should bring our 4yo with him, so he could see his grandparents. So last night I said 'I assume you arent taking S with you to ohio?" and he said no, I'm driving, and its goign to be a quick trip because we have court that monday. I said "no we don't". And he said "yes we do, thats the case management date, thats the divorce date" Well, thats is the case managemnet date thats on our forms, and that does mean that if everything is resolved, it could be final on that date, but when I saw my lawyer she said there is no way it would be final on that day. So I am not sure if we have to go to court that day, but H really thought it would be final then! I said "I'm not talking about this now" and he actually said "yes we are!" I said "No I'm not" and he was soooo flustered. That's obviously why he is so stressed about getting things resolved and giving in to things. He's under so much pressure. I cannot wait for all that pressure to build and for their relationship to explode!!