Trying to save my M. W not really trying though.

[etrain]

Thanks so much to all of you. I'm going out to purchase DR today.
He had our 2nd MC session yesterday & I was able to get a lot off my chest. My W is sticking to her "story" that about 3-4 years ago, she realized she was never "in love" with me. I don't believe that because I remember the good times...and there were many...but that's what's going through my W's head. So now I face the challenge of regaining a love that was NEVER EVEN THERE, according to my W.
My W & I started dating when she was only 18 and that seems to be part of the issue. She had this fairytale view of what M is...and I think some of that is still lingering. The MC even picked up on it when my W said her idea of M is having that constant fire burning when you see your spouse..that spark that never goes away. She started to backtrack a bit when the MC explained that it's a little unrealistic to expect that to last forever & that M's change over time...but backtracking aside, that's what she really feels because she's said it to me more than once.

The MC did get my W to agree to try some of the exercises in the marriage book I've been reading, so maybe that's a start...assuming she actually follows through. (not DB or DR..it's another book I picked up)

I'm not very optimistic right now. The possibility of seperation and D was actually discussed in MC & it felt all too real. In my W's mind, our M is already over.

The MC scheduled us for another appt next week...saying to call if one or both of us decides we don't want to go. It gave me the impression that even the MC has lost hope.

I'm trying to hang in there. If our M does end, I want to be able to say I gave everything I had to make it work. And I expressed that to my W. Our son is worth it...our family is worth it...and I'm worth it.