Just a Little of that Human Touch

[Kettricken]

Hey, choc, a whole bushel of dancing bananas from me (well, you know what I mean ....) Yay, both of you!!!!

It's a subtle vibe, I think. There can be an unspoken "stooping to conquer" Long Suffering Savior emotional projection coming from the betrayed spouse. It seems like since infidelity is the ultimate dealbreaker for a lot of people, and certainly indefensible from a Christian perspective, a certain amount of humility can get lost in all the righteous indignation. "*I* am fighting for my marriage and *I* am willing to take s/he back and be all Christlikey and forgiving; aren't I wonderful?" Which is rarely warranted, being as there are almost always plenty of faults on both sides to go around. Even if it's justified, it's counterproductive; who wants to come back to a marriage with a shaming, self-righteous Father (or Mother) Figure? and what basis is guilt for rebuilding a healthy relationship?

It's not about accepting behavior that outrages your standards ... it's about your attitude during the process of maintaining your boundaries..

A little of that human touch, indeed ... an environment of partnership and empathy and acceptance of mutual fallibility, even if one partner fallibled-up much more obviously than the other.

Choc, yer doin' great.