Trying to save my M. W not really trying though.

[etrain]

Etrain:

Virtually everyone here is trying to save their marriage while their partner is not. We have all heard comments like the ones your wife has said to you.

I was here four years ago and busted our divorce. Obviously, I wasn't 100% successful or I wouldn't be back - but it can be done. For me, just knowing that I put every effort into me and my marriage is important. Even if our marriage ends I will not feel guilty, since I will know I did everything I could.

Sure, the DB principles are about saving your marriage and that is the ultimate goal of everyone here, but (you will read this a lot) you can't make changes just to bust your divorce. The changes need to be real and for you. If your wife decides she wants to be with the new and better you, than great. If not, you will still have done something very few people do in their lifetime - truly given 100% and made you a better man and better father.

Thanks Indy. Your post makes a ton of sense. I'll be picking up or ordering DB this week. If it can help ME, then it's worth it. If it saves my M in the meantime, better yet.
I hope my W gets to the point where we can work on our M together. Until then, I suppose all I can do is work on myself & be a great father to my son.