Ups and Downs

[Energizer Bunny]

All good suggestions. I'm really trying on all fronts. It's hard to validate when I see things so differently. W is smart. Saying things like "I'm sorry you feel that way" pi$$es her off. She just wants to hear "you're right, I am a bad man and we aren't meant to be together." I've gotten better at this though. I choose words very carefully.

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She watched some recorded TV last night. We used to do this together all of the time pre-bomb. We talked about the episode and I think she wanted me to stay and watch it with her, but she didn't ask me to. (she never asks me to do anything...always says if I wanted to I would. It's maddening) So I went upstairs and read.

I just got a book called Love Must Be Tough. W saw it sitting on the counter, read the title and said "ain't that the truth."

Before bedtime I went downstairs and gave W a hug. She held onto me for a while again. The dog jumped up and we played with her for 20 minutes or so. Very playful. The joke here is that the dog that we have LOVES me and gets jealous of W. If I hug W or sit close to W, the dog jumps in between us. She usually puts her behind on W freaks out to get my attention. We were laughing hard about it.

When W was getting ready for bed she stuck her head in "my" room a couple of times. (she always has some 'legitimate' reason for it) Finally I said "just get over here and give me a hug'. She did. She cuddled up with me for a minute...until the dog jumped in again.

No kisses. No ILY's. Then off to "her" room for the night.

S7 went and laid with her this morning when I was getting ready for work. I went in to kiss him G'bye. Told W have a good day, but offered no hugs/kisses, etc.

I'm sure she's still going, but once again this will be something more positive to miss than arguing and coldness.