Has it really been 3 years?

[25yearsmlc]

You're very welcome. Don't know your sitch but will say, based on your signature, that leaning on Him helps a whole lot. Be careful with your faith though. If you turn it over to Him, then you still have work to do on yourself. In other words, "standing" does not mean to "stand still"...as some here do. They'll pray and quote scripture but only to prove their spouse wrong, or blame, or so they can be a martyr and NOT change themselves. Plus, we must acknowledge that free will does exist. So your spouse may not make the choice God wants him to make...

I believe that trusting God matters so much b/c if you do the work God wants you to do on yourself, then no matter what your h does with his free will, God has something good for you around the next corner. You really will be alright, no matter what. I think that's what it means to turn it over to God, and not take it back.

Just do as He would have you do, and trust that you'll be fine. And you will be. Regardless of your h....

I'll check on your sitch this week but also know there are some others who reconciled here. But you won't know. For instance Orich just stopped posting b/c his WAW came back to the M, but asked him not to share or post here anymore b/c she feels it violates their marital privacy and so does FaithfulH's wife. So you see, there are more success stories here than you know.

But we all have some things in common and for each of us, detaching and GAL DID happen. We let go and started to move forward without losing all hope. None of us reconciled by begging or pleading or waiting around. We owned our "crap" and said we'd do things differently if we got the chance but we also realized how good we had to let our spouses figure things out for themselves and MAYBE LOSE US... I came pretty close to being alright with whatever happened. Not "hopeless" but accepting. For me, that helped a lot.

Good luck,
and keep posting as it does help. Also if you get a chance try a DB coach session. They're very specific in their help and they helped me a lot.
J-