It seems your W wants you to get help now simply for your wellbeing and not so much for the sake of the M. If she sees herself out of the picture, then she just wants you to get well and out of this addiction pit that you've been in. Sounds as if she's removing herself. But, how was she when both of you were into swinging? Did she like it or did she endure it to make you happy?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
