A few things I would like to comment on, these are just my thoughts, don't want to confuse you more.
Your IC
I thought you were going to be working on getting you to a good place with your separation with her for the next few weeks. If you are leaving feeling like crap, well thats not working. I saw a quote I liked saying something like when your marriage is in crisis, is your number one priorty to move it to a better place not to fix everything wrong between you. Your IC seems to want to fix everything wrong. And if she does not believe in MLC and you are posting here, then you are getting conflicting advice on how to solve your problem. Consistancy is needed with your methods. Where do you get more support, what makes you feel better and offers more solutions both for you and for trying to keep your marriage some sort of open? Oh, and just how many marriages has your IC actually fixed from crisis situation as opposed to facilitating a break up? I know we only get snippets from you about her, but she bugs me too.
H not caring about your marriage.
I know you know this, he is not able to right now. What little he is doing is the best he can do and it sucks. You are doing this for your kids too, use that motivation when your H does not work for motivation. Its fine to feel like crap, really. Don't fight it. Heres a song I have been listening to all week, somes up my mood!
And until you know what is happening with your marriage, I believe keeping the kids out of it is a good thing too.
Does MLC exist?
Err..maybe? But I sure believe in depression and MLC is just a subset of that. And I also believe my H has just had a major depressive episode, with both covert and overt depression. The rest is details, I can pull the data to prove or disprove but I do believe in depression for sure and that is good enough for me.
Is H worth hanging in there for?
Not even worth it for me to try to answer this until I see where him, me and us end up, if its enough for me. And I will just wait as long as I can to see if I can get there. And thats just the best that I can do at the end of the day.
You havn't finished your journey yet, it will get better and easier again, maybe harder too. Miracles can happen when you least expect them, just not happening right now today.
