Yesterday's game was going to be tough coming off the big upset of USC. I was hoping they'd avoid the let down, but honestly, if they were asked at the start of the season if they'd be ok w/a 2-2 start with LSU, USC and a road game at a much improving Stanford, I know they'd have taken it gladly.
I LOVED that link. I was cracking up, not only at how crazy she went, but his running commentary was very funny. Good stuff indeed.
One thing that I find interesting about GF is when we first started talking, she said she dated a few guys before me who drove her crazy b/c they would get really upset w/her when she didn't answer their texts or e-mails right away. Well, I've made sure not to ever do that b/c it reeks of insecurity, but it is a bit funny that she did that to me yesterday.
I don't think she's insecure about us, but I do think it clearly shows she's interested in me and us. I've been pretty quick w/replying to her texts, so I think it is a good thing if I occasionally don't reply right away. Again, not to play games, but to show that I'm my own person and not at anyone's beck and call.
It is all part of developing a healthy me as well as a healthy groundwork for us. She still waits quite often before replying to me, so there does need to be some balance. Again, on the positive side, I don't get anywhere near obsessive and needy when I don't hear back from her right away. Instead, I just roll w/it, continue to do my own thing and realize we'll talk later.
I mean, there has been nothing dishonest about our R up to this point, so I see no reason to doubt GF. For me to try and worry about why she's not geting right back to me ASAP would only be self-defeating for me and lead to my projecting old habits of fear and insecurity on to my present R. Again, in a way, this is an excellent opportunity for me to learn and grow in terms of having a healthy R. I'm taking this as a opportunity for growth, so I really focus on just existing, limiting expectations and going w/the flow.
As I've said before, if we do continue to move forward like it feels as if we are, then our roles will begin to change. One thing that must remain the same, however, is my ability to do things for myself apart from her and for me to continue to trust and believe in her. I'm doing this so far and it is working...although, as I've said time and time again, it is so new and foreign to me that I'm a work in progress this time around.
Evolution of RTL is a good thing as the old RTL didn't love himself and wasn't truly happy. Now I can see what I need to do and this R w/GF is helping me to become a better, more confident man.
