Sorry to hear your brother was such an a**hole. Maybe it was just because it was his b'day & he didn't want to get into a heavy convo. Or maybe he just doesn't really understand & is an emotional bully. I have a GF like that & after getting slammed verbally by her, I never talked about my M or R after that to her.
I, as well, am trying to find which is the right path towards my x. I still love my xh, yet I see little change that he has learned anything from all this. So, would I want him back as is - nope. Have I moved on yet - nope - still trying to figure that one out & have ordered some after divorce books. Live & learn & do what makes you happy. Kinda sounds like you should not have gone out of your way for her when she was sick. Unless, you can keep the "no expectations" in the right frame of mind. Don't start blaming this all on yourself, it's not all your fault & you know that. After all of this, I think when you don't come from a Leave it to Beaver family, M is a hundred times harder & when both do - it's a million times harder. Inside, I do admit, I hold a grudge for my x, that did not really try. Really trying means M counseling & sorting through the problems areas & really working on yourself. (Not just going through the motions). Some people just cannot face that guilt, fear & unhappiness within.
Hope you have a nice Sunday!
Me39, XH45 Kids 3 dogs, 2 cats Divorced 6/4/09 Tricky thing is not how you live, but how you live with yourself. (POTC)
