It's too hard sometimes

[ClingingToHope]

Wow, there's a lot here.

Get your stuff out of there as soon as possible and don't do it in a piecemeal fashion so it looks like you are leaving things there for her to remember you by.

I did that, kind of, and that gave her the ability to stack things up for me to take when I did have to come over. That put me on the defensive right away.

I tried several things in the first two months -- including a letter right before moving into my apartment asking if she was really sure because I was about to write an $1,100 check. That's a mortgage payment.

She didn't respond.

After I moved out I started going to a marriage class and learning all the things I did wrong and I wrote her another letter. This one I didn't ask her to come back or to reconsider, I just went through all of things I realized I'd done wrong and that I finally saw her point on things.

She responded to that letter and we had our first and still only good long talk about our relationship since I moved out.

There's been no improvement since, but there's also been no talk of pushing anything else forward. I'm just in limbo.

Go as dark as possible. These last couple of weeks I've tried not to call or text her unless I absolutely had to. I don't know if it's helping yet or not, but it's helping me. When I talk or see her my resolve crumbles a bit.

Being separated or divorced when you have kids is like having a girl break up with you in high school and you see her every day because you have a class together.

The less contact the better.