So, wanted to journal.... Today is H's birthday and I decided to use the day to do a 180. I'm guilty of totally spoiling my H and his birthday I usually do something for him of course, stupidly even when he does nothing for mind. But without the knowledge of how R work, I thought then that I was showing a good example, not realizing that I was just enabling him and allowing him to take me for granted. About 2 days ago he even had the nerve to be telling me about a tool he wants and I could get that for his b-day. I was silent and he realized so he said I guess that's a no. I said I'm getting him the same thing he got me last yr - nothing. Then he goes on to talk about how this yr will be different. Whatever.
Well it was different for me. Normally, he is all on my mind for his b-day and although I was thinking about him. I decided not to show it - treat him like I would any other distant friend. So, I texted him a happy b-day and wishing him many more. That's all he gets. He needs to realized that he has changed things between us. Funny thing is that I truly think that I'm the only one that celebrates his b-day. Maybe ow did, not really sure. But I know his family never did. They could care less.
As I told him, maybe next yr. But maybe no. I should have told him, "now H, you know very well that you don't deserve a b-day present." But I didn't.
Let him stew on that for a while.... I need to de-throne hi a**.
Then he goes on to talk about how this yr will be different. Whatever.
