I am brand new to this site. My bomb was dropped about six months ago with my 41 yr old husband announcing to me that he has a new friend at work (23 yr. old recovering alcohlic and addict) and then soon to be followed by the ILYBNILWYA speech. Since then, he is hardly ever home, lies about where he's been, adamantly denies a PA but admits to a EA. We have been married 19 years with three amazing teenagers. Our marriage was good and strong in many ways. Now he is discussing separation and divorce and trying to convince me we were never meant to be together, so therefore divorce would be good for both of us and the kids. I am devestated and broken hearted. Sometimes we make progress... but then he does something that upsets me so much that I "react" - get upset, yell, cry, etc. and this always pushes him further away. I know I shouldn't do it, but it is so hurtful and I am still so blindsided that I can't seem to stop... any suggestions for how to change this behavior and become more detached? Thanks so much!
