I wouldn't "push" anything. If you ask about her day and it looks like you're getting the "snooping" look, just let it go.
As far as counseling is concerned, I wouldn't ask as it relates to the two of you per say. (Is the C she is looking for for herself?) Are you communicating well about the kids? Are the kids doing ok? What do they know, if anything (we all know they know something)?
The reason I ask this, my H (I'm 1 1/2 yrs sep. 2 1/2+ post bomb) and I do C for the kids and communication between us about them (actually us DB coach for this as is easier on the phone. NO, I do not come with any agenda, but my D's). It has been helpful for me.
I like the changes you have made for yourself. That she doesn't comment does not mean she doesn't notice (ok, you might have an argument with the haircut ).
Quote:
(not directly stated, but I’m sure she would have also said she hated me also)
Lose thoughts like this. You really don't know what she's thinking. I was more concerned that my H was indifferent to me b/c that is a lack of any kind of passion.
After all this time, I still don't ask about us. Some things have come up and I deal with it all as honestly and compassionately as I can. Bottom line, I let him bring it up to me. Has it worked? Don't know. I know he hasn't filed and I even got a "you are amazing" last month.
Keep working on you and focus on the kids. Hang in there.
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