You are getting great advice, I was in your shoes just 9 months ago. I did everything you did, with the pursuing the crying the begging, the neediness. Then I decided to say my piece one final time, the whole you are breaking up this family, are you insane, how are you going to look into the eyes of our children and tell them you are leaving because I will not lie for you and tell them that this is what we want. I luckily found this site the next day, and started to implement the wonderful advice I received.
I got a haircut, started to wear nicer clothes, worked out, lost about 15 lbs, looking good. Started to wear cologne, started to go out with the fellas on Friday evening, did my 180's, started making the bed for I also sleep in our bed, started to do the dishes for the family. Oh, and I started to go to this hot little trainer at the gym.
A couple of weeks later she said she was going to try to work on us, she started to go to an IC and a few months later I was invited in.
I have made these changes intially for my wife to notice. I realized that the changes I made are really good for me. My wife noticing is just an awesome by product.
You can do this, but you have to throw out your emotions, I pretended that she left me, because really she did, although she was in the house with me, I did my own thing, played with the kids, went out, played golf, and gave her the space that she needed. I was pleasant with her, but I spoke to her only when she spoke to me, and I always ended a call or convo first.
Get to be a fun guy again, that guy she fell in love with the first time. Be confident, take care of the business that you need to take care of financially. Be a leader. If she brings up anything, be nice and informative, but also really too busy to hang around, you have alot of stuff going on. And if not, fake it until you make it.
Good luck and let me know if I can help in any way.
