Ups and Downs

[Energizer Bunny]

"Needs to experience independence?" It takes tearing apart a family to experience independence? Why not take a week and go hiking in Europe?

There is a difference between being a jerk, and being a strong MAN.

I agree. I'm trying to find that balance.

I'll simply suggest that you be kind and loving, but draw a line - if you don't like the word boundary. If she moves out, no more ML, no more money beyond what is agreed on, no helping her move out, none of that. If she truly wants independence, give it to her.

Everything you say makes sense. She doesn't though. She wants me to be a part of this with her. huh? what? EB is confused by this.

This is hard for me. It seems like a good opportunity to show her that I want her to be happy and her needs are important (keep in mind, she said she plans on coming home and use this place as investment property). By refusing to be a part of this with her would only separate us further. She would see it as me "teaching her a lesson."

If she asks too much of me I have no probmem saying no though. I have already said that I can accept this. I don't have to like it. And don't expect me to get excited and go pick out paint colors at Home Depot with you.

Whatever I don't do with her though, she will just have GF do with her.

Thanks for all of your feedback. I truly appreciate it.