Just catching up tonight - thanks for the posts! Pam, I hope David does start reading. THere is a lot of hope and possibilites of the future expressed on this BB.
Alaska - I'm so tickled to see you in piecing!! THis is a strange phase to be in -
Karen, I agree that would be nice. W just isn't ready for it. She's really aware of the boundary thing now, and it's essential for her healing. I'm realizing how much is there for her to get over. Optimist hit the nail on the head with issues from her past. This might be a long road, really, W has a lot of things to heal from and a lot of things to discover with vunerability, intimacy, and boundaries - as do I, but in a different context. She's working on it, she's working on it hard in therapy, etc. and the best thing I can do is not pressure her. Give her time to work on it.
I told her tonight that I get very anxious about making a mistake and pushing her away, and she said that she could understand me feeling that way, but she doesn't need me to be perfect and what I've done so far she's found amazing. I need to get it in my head that we're on more solid ground now, feel good about that. There's just more work to do is all. More time until it's 100%.
Totite - thanks for the input! I tell you, most of my hang-ups and sources of embarassment are long gone at this point. Kind of liberating! The couple of months before the bomb, we were talking a lot more about what each other liked, were finding promising positions (and other details) - I think once we get back to that point, we'll be in a much better position to investigate this further. I think that I'm much more comfortable personally addressing these things than I was. I'm also speculating that W's change of perspective on intimacy and working on it as hard as she is may affect a change in this area too. We'll see. As this point it's my goal to be completely supportive of this whole process, and when we get there we'll have fun with new ideas.
Yeah, our house is about to undergo a major transformation. W is definitely nesting... nice to see her investing her time in this house, this home, and making it ours. Called about indoor cabinets today; still need to call more landscapers to finish all that off. I've seen your posts about the wall - sounds like a lot of fun! I love projects like that.
Well, it's 11:30 and I'm about to fall asleep at the keyboard (hopefully this posts reads well and makes sense, cause I don't feel too coherent). Type at you later!
