Again, this is where this forum becomes such a blessing. Post all of your vents on here.
The urge to make a preemptive strike can become almost overwhelming - trust me, I've been there. I've sat and sweated through the silence before, but it's always been worth it, and I think just about everyone on here will agree with me.
You have made yourself clear to your W - she knows how you feel, and that you want the marriage back. But just keep reminding yourself she is fighting resentment, bitterness, etc. I can picture herself asking, "Why NOW? Does he expect me to just forgive him, and he can waltz in like nothing happened?"
I don't know your dynamics, but hang tough, hang tight. Be cordial if she approaches you, but absolutely no "temperature taking", no R talk - if you have to stuff a washcloth in your mouth, do it.
