H with 1foot out the door...LONG

[ginab1966]

Ok...time to get a bit real about Retrou. One of your assignmets is to keep things "going" with the post sessions and the dialogue. It's recommended and absolutely not something you HAVE to do but I can see, for us, it is imperative that we continue with the Dialogue technique. Our next post session is this Saturday and we've been given "homework" to do. We are supposed to dialogue each night. I have had to remind H each night about the dialogue session and he is just phoning it in. His heart isn't even close to being in it. It's supposed to be 20 min. You write for 10 and then dialogue for 10. Last night our dialogue lasted 30 seconds at best. I had to pry him off the computer game to come upstairs and do it and then he spent his 30 seconds and then went back downstairs for the rest of the night. When he went back downstairs I will admitt that I sat at the table and just cried. Not sobbing or anything but quiet tears of utter frustration. I continually feel like I'm doing this alone. Like I'm the only one rowing. It's hard. I am doing my very best to concentrate on the fact that he has agreed to go to the post sessions and that he DID come up and at least participated in the dialogue no matter how lame his participation was. I need to remember that he's giving me what he is willing to give me right now and I just have to be patient, accept it and not wrap my whole worlds happiness into him. I need to continue to GAL. I realized that last night at the table. I sort of backslid a bit and now I have to dig deep and GAL. It's just so hard with a 4 year old. H gets very resentful when I'm out all the time. Such as...I have a going away thing for a co-worker after work tomorrow night and then I have CoDA meetings Friday night. That means he will have to put D to bed two nights in a row. He's not going to be happy...not one little bit. So, that makes GAL'ing a bit harder.

I'm ok...reality is just setting in after being on the pink cloud of the weekend. I just have to keep things in perspective and not become emotional.

Gina B