Sounds like a lot of positive things happened with you tonight. Be careful though about thinking you are detached. Detachment is a process that takes a long time. It's like a skill, such as a martial art. BTW, As a former Judo student from way back, I appreciated Dia's analogy. I have likened my personal evolution in my sitch to the type of discipline similar to that gained through the martial arts.
Hang in there, I think you are doing great.
THnks BJ
Yeah, I know you are right. Today already I'm feeling less calm. Gotta keep working it.
I looked up some martial (marital) arts info. Really helped. THey reminded me that my power is in being calm and centered in mind and body. that th opponent's force is their vulnerability and no let that force go on it's own rather than resist it.
Still not sure what this looks like for M. However, being centered and not thrown into panic by his attacks are a good starting place. [/quot]
Hope,
Your on the right track with your thinking on this. Early in my sitch one of the things that kept me grounded was a saying from one of my boyhood idols, Bruce Lee, who said "Be like Water". Whenever your H comes at you with this garbage and/or starts his tirades just think "Be like Water".
BJ,
I have no idea what that means. LOL If you can share with me what it means to you, I would appreciate it. I guess it means no resistance, pure acceptance and the ability to keep flowing.
