Another interesting day in DB land. I rang H back today as I promised I would last night to update him on the health issues I mentioned last night. We spoke for 25 minutes and it was like H of old....very caring and pleasant as he can be. We talked about a few kid issues and other stuff. He reiterated that he wants us to be friends. I said that this time I deserved to be treated with respect (referring but not renaming shouting/name calling/swearing) and that it should not be me that was the only one who initiated friendship. He said he understood that. I figured I had nothing to lose by setting the boundaries.
I very clearly told him that this was the last chance for us to be friends and any behaviour from him that was contrary to what I expected would mean that I would again revert to nc as I had learnt that I didn't need him if he behaved so appalingly. So, yes he did notice the nc Nell. In good DB style I ended the conversation first.
Interestingly, he did not say a word about the settlement or my solicitor. I still think settlement is the way to go but I will give it a few more days.
So have I just opened myself to more cake eating? Probably, but I figure I've put it out there and he knows my expectations. NC has really shown me I'm just fine however things go and if he stuffs up, it's his loss. Think this knowledge should in turn enhance my sense of confidence and self worth (and I'm sure the surgery has helped that too)!
So still wondering if the email was about settlement or about nc!!
