Tricked into seperation

[lonelywolf]

Got the package from the court today. I have to watch a two hour video and read some materials, then take a test before the court will order the mediation/conciliation.

It's rather depressing. Since AZ is a no-fault divorce state, the materials are 90% focused on getting the left behind spouse to accept that the marriage is over and its time to move on. Of course, most of the time, in AZ, couples have entered this because once divorce has been filed for, the couples have to have mediation counseling. I've requested it before anything has been filed.

Once I've "taken the course" they'll issue me a certificate, saying I've taken the class, and then my wife will be required to spend one hour on the phone with me and a marriage counselor to see if the marriage can be saved at all, and if not, to work out a reasonable compromise on child custody until the courts make a ruling.

I'm not sure what I should say once the session itself takes place. The lawyer I talked to says that, if the divorce goes to trial over things like child custody and spousal maintenance, it could take several months (perhaps even a year) for the divorce to be finalized. That's actually good news, sort of. It may bankrupt me, but it will give my wife time to get her head on straight.

My mother says my best chance is to give my wife time to start missing me. So far, my mother has been right on everything - and every mistake I've made has been ignoring my mother's advice.

When I get paid again, I may just set some money aside for a DB counseling session.