I don't have any problems with good sex or even making love, but when my wife is into it one day, and then the next day says she only did it cuz she was lonely, scared, remorseful, comforted, then it gets really confusing and sticky.
Don't take what she says too seriously. the point is she wants sex, and she wants it with you. Sex with you calms whatever is bothering her. Isn't that a good thing? I could say I only ate the cheesecake because I was bored and depressed. But truthfully, I ate the cheesecake because it was sinfully delicious!
I stopped having sex with H because he was consistently remorseful and weird after. It is an awful feeling and not worth it IMO.
And cheesecake tastes good but is not good when you're on a diet. Makes you feel bad and makes your a** bigger.
I don't think it helps the R. If the WAS wants distance and feels they can't get it, it just reinforces those negative feelings. Plus, how YOU feel about it is important too. I hated feeling like his drug or his guilty indulgence.
