[ thanks for the stereotype breakaway, we always enjoy having the finger pointed at us.
you always make me laugh, rob...I think I need to go get ready to have my husband take me now...
Breakaway.... you complete me! LOL! Even when you're being a smart a$$ you have a bit of a sense of humor (I stress a "bit"), not bad ;-)
I hope you & your husband have a good time, put on the barry white cd, get jiggy with it and all that good stuff, love is a beautiful thing!
yeah that was good. Snarky yet still funny.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
i wouldn't bother demanding yet that she stop seeing the OM. . .
I WOULD! This has been going on for 2 years. I fail to see how continuing to have a third party in this relationship is acceptable.
it's not acceptable. all i'm saying is it shouldn't be a precondition for MC. you want to get her into the process first, and have the focus on your marriage aand relationship and family. it will be obvious to her, if she thinks about it for a second, that she can't come back to her family and hang on to the OM. make this clear at some point, but not up front. remember, she's still somewhat in a fog, and could interpret this as controlling.
wait til she says what she wants in MC, then tell her what the conditions are. not the other way around.
just my opinion.
me 30 WAW 30 M 8 yrs T 9.5 yrs
3 cats 9,6,6
W left 5/31/09 W stopped most contact 06/26/09 W filed 7/22/09 (haven't been served)
Journaling: Tuesday evening: Had a wonderful night with the girls. D3 fell asleep in my arms after reading the "Grinch who Stole Christmas" (Dr. Seuss is grand). I really don't feel like thinking about W tonight.
I really don't feel like thinking about W tonight.
good answer.
Originally Posted By: Puppy Dog Tails
because almost any good MC will tell you that the MCing won't be effective as long as one of the marital partners is still in an active affair.
Puppy
Originally Posted By: Puppy Dog Tails
Originally Posted By: tristan
What else would a pro-marriage marriage counselor say?
You'd be surprised. Many supposedly "pro-marriage" counselors do more to help the wayward spouse "self-actualize" or "find themselves" than they do to actually try to support the marriage.
Good ones are few and far between.
Puppy
heed this advice.
and how comes you didnt take the sex when she was apparently making herself available to you? that pre-connection will make for a much better marriage counselling experience for y'all.
I figure that any positive movement in working on the marriage should be accepted. Plus, I have already said it is a good first step; wouldn't want to go back on my word. OM does need to be addressed, but agree it can be done within the confines of MC.
