Sometimes what's best for the kids is to hold their father up to the higher standard, and to force him to try and reach it.
Considering your description of his character and his past history, I do not find this at all credible or compelling:
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Although it was his discussion with the lawyer that set him off, he is promising changes outside of just the divorce process, saying he is going to be open and honest with everyone about everything. (meaning that he is telling the OW how his relationship with me and the kids is going to be, regardless of what she thinks).
I would be willing to bet you ANYTHING that he most certainly has NOT been honest with the OW. Is there a way for you to confirm that, without tipping him off?
