This post marks my moving to Piecing. Thanks to Kitti for providing me with my first Piecing post subject.
My sitch:
Me: 33 yo W: 32 yo Kids: Twin boys, 3 yo in Nov. Bomb: July 17 2003 W was first seeking D, then seeking S; in a sequence of events from Thursday to Sunday, we have reconciled, we have pulled out of the offer on a house for W, and we are enthusiastically and happily committed to rebuilding our marriage.
We are still in separate bedrooms. We want to take this slowly. We are going to councilling. Things to work on include both of our issues with boundaries, intimacy, etc. so we're taking it slow.
Haven't been getting to the boards as much as I'm used to here lately, so I need to catch up on everyone's threads here soon.
Here's something interesting - my W gave me a "homework assignment" this morning. She wants me to make a list of things that I like, things she can do to show she loves me. The funny thing is - this is going to be hard for me! I really don't know. Good assingment.
Bill - welcome to piecing! I highly recommend that you read The Five Love Languages by Chapman with your W - will help you both to realize what "languages" you need to speak for your spouse to feel loved. Will help with your homework assignment. Basically, the five languages are Physical touch (hugging, handholding etc - not just sex) Acts of service, Quality time, gifts, and Words of affirmation. Usually each of us has a couple languages we prefer to receive in (may be completely different from the ones we express ourselves with) and it really helps to know your partner's languages (Why waste time washing her car for her when what she really wants is for you to tell her ILY and goive her a flowery card?).
spot, I will (even if I am the second post. If I don't Shiny will).
. At least that way Kitti can come