For most people the only way to stop thinking or obsessing on one thing is to focus on another. I doubt you will be able to "just be" unless you can divert your energy.
Like I said, I think you are suffering because you are running on two tracks but don't want to. You insist you need it over but you still want to make it make sense and you argue with her and you want resolution. If you could accept the reality of what you are experiencing both emotionally and logistically, you could have some peace. Again, you want to pound your fist and be "done" but you are still so in it.
How can you slow down? Be more still. Start by always waiting to respond to any call, email or text. Get out of the briar patch. I think you want the contact with her even if it is to argue.
You also tend to kind of ignore a lot of good advice on here. Obviously, you can take what works for you and leave the rest, but what do you think of the messages you are getting here? Is it starting to make sense? Accepting, giving up control, while still taking care of yourself...etc. Anything resonating?
