I apologize again for my earlier post - I missed the whole story, something that is a pet peeve of mine!
You are certainly worthy of forgiveness. I know a man that cheated on his wife once. He has said that, given the choice, to go back he would almost rather choose to die than to have that moment. Not only did it serve to reveal to him how pathetic affairs were, but also showed him how much he loved his wife, and satisfying his physical desires in return for losing his family was ridiculous.
He has been true for about 8 years I'm guessing, never has looked at another woman since.
If this is how YOU feel, you are absolutely worth forgiveness. You did screw up, royally. But, we all have - some just make adultery the "scarlet letter" - when, in my opinion, there are people that have sabotaged their marriages through not communicating, being distant, verbal/emotional/physical abuse, and so on.
You do reap what you sow - and maybe this is what God has for you. You can, at this point, handle it with grace and dignity. You can learn from it, become a better person - assume the mantle of being a man. And not a crotch-scratching, beer-guzzling, belching, hairy man, but a man who is worthy of respect and takes responsibility for his actions, and makes sure that such actions never occur again!
