That is a tough one. I really don't know what advice to give since my H is having an affair as well, and I don't know what to do myself!
I think acknowledging the anniversary may just push your H away. I've read the best thing to do right now is to read DR, practice the techniques, and GAL! Limit your contact with him. End your conversations first. Do for you right now and make yourself happy!
In my experience, I have found that when a spouse is having an A and there are emotions involved (i.e. the spouse thinks he/she is in love with OP) there is not much you can do. Talking to your spouse is going to be like talking to a wall. He doesn't want to hear about what he is doing wrong, or about your R, and how much you love him. Anything you say to try to reel him back to you is going to do the opposite of what you want. When they think they are "in love" with someone else, they are unfortunately in a state of euphoria and that R has to play itself out.
Keep posting here. There are so many wonderful helpful people who have sound advice to offer.
