I recently confirmed with a harsh way my stbxH had a full blown affair with the OW I suspected. I got to read 1000 emails she had sent him over a three year period (first year while we were together and the rest 2 while separated which I honestly dont consider cheating). What hurt me the most, where the emails were she was giving him advice on issues related to work, our kids, his friends and of course the ones they were planning their future together...
Weirdly, although she had written emails describing -in detail- their sexual encounters (some), those were not as bad for me. I seem to have forgotten them already. The fact that that woman KNEW my H's anxieties and worries and issues while I was completely shut out of his life, was what hurt the most.
A PA, especially like a one stand thing, or a 3 month fling, would be much easier to get over, the fact that this woman had/is an addiction to him, he needed her in his life, sucked...
stbxH today, asked me for an honest try to reconcile. My biggest fear would not be that they meet for sex again, it is that they will be missing each other as friends, as humans, as partners in life... K
