I swear, he sounds just like he does when we were dating and before S. He sounds light, happy and relaxed. He's now on the road back home to us. He asked what we were doing tomorrow and if we'd be at our friends house with him watching Sunday football.
So off to do dinner (hibachi) with a girlfriend and her S.
I do not want to put a damper on the positive things you are seeing. They are great! As always, with care and concern, I just want to say, this happens with the MLCer. He is peeking out, seeing if its safe. He might tuck back in a little.
So, slow and steady now. Keep it light, no pressure, right? Just let life unfold.
Today has been normal and calm. H just left to go do a few things back at his place and we'll meet up with him later to watch some football at a friends house and have dinner.
I'm starting pack for my trip to VA this Thursday to see my family.
Another good thing for me during this time. Some true space.
This morning H sounded sort of short and stressed on the phone. I asked if he was ok, because he sounded weird. Long pause. He goes into how much he has to cram into this week since he's going on a golf trip on Thursday and is just stressed trying to figure it all out. I said, "OK, let's cancel tonight (movie night with S) and you can take that time to get more done." He said "No, part of this week is trying to spend as much time with you guys since you'll be gone for more than a week." I said "Awww, thank you, we appreciate that. Let me know if I can help." And we changed subjects briefly and I hung up on him.
He later sent me an email about finances. All normal. He ends it with...."and btw, i really do appreciate you being so okay with my little adventure this past weekend - thanks! see how nice that turned out for our checking account? no drama=more money! so lets make it thruough the next 2 weeks with no drama and then go from there..."
And it should be easier to make it through the next two weeks, drama free as I'll be gone for most of it!
So, I continue to lay low with even lower expectations!
Oh, one more thing to mention....during last night's good night call....at the end of the conversation, I just threw it out there...I told him "You know, you don't have to respond." He said "To what?" I said "To my response to the filing." He said "What do you mean?" I answered, "You don't have to respond. I had to respond in 20 days. You don't. You can just let it sit there and after 365 days from my answer, it just goes away." He was quiet for a long time. And I said "Ok, wasn't sure if you knew that and for some reason, it was important to me that you know that." He said "Ok Lovie." I said good night.
Then I got the above email. So I think it helped him to know he doesn't have a time line and he doesn't have to do anything. It can just sit there until it rots and goes away on it's own.
That's exactly what I'm going to do. To me, he's basically requested exactly that..."no drama for two weeks and let's go from there".
I hope by telling him about not having to do anything he felt relief. I really don't think his lawyer told him he doesn't need to do anything....he can just let it be. My lawyer did tell me exactly that.
So we will see.
Really looking forward to my trip to the Big VA this week!
