I'm new wondering if this works...

[BigJohn]

He just gets more p.o.ed and drives off like a maniac mumbling something about maybe going to the East Bay (OW i figure).

Hope,

Do you live in San Francisco? The reason I ask is because the courts there should be pretty favorable to you as a mother. Your H may not have it as easy as you or he thinks. In the event of a D, he is going to have to prove he deserves 50/50 joint physical custody. I know this because I'm going to mediation very soon up here in the North Bay (similar venue) and it's not going to be a cake walk for me even though I'm a dedicated father.

Regarding the legal separation proposal, I don't know why your H is making such a big deal out of this. The only obvious benefit to legal S over D is that you can maintain your family health insurance. Could this be some sort of power play on his part? A bluff of some sort?

Also, there is no marital misconduct issues since California is a no-fault D state. (How I wish you and I lived in Florida where Stronger lives right now.)

Hope this puts your mind a little at ease.