So after his talk that had nothing to do with my question, I told him that I was going to conclude from this that he doesn't want to commit. Of course he said that he didn't think that was appropriate either.
Here's the thing: HE DOESN'T GET TO TELL YOU WHAT YOUR OWN CONCLUSIONS NEED TO BE.
So:
You: "You leave me with no other reasonable conclusion than you are not prepared to commit to our marriage, the way a husband and a wife OUGHT to be committed to one another. I do appreciate your honesty -- it gives me clarity."
Him: "Well, I don't think that's quite appropriate either ..."
You: "I'm sorry you feel that way, but you don't get to tell me how I get to feel. I have my own decisions to make. Thank you."
And then end the conversation, excusing yourself to go do something.
Here's the paradox of DBing, Had Enough: only until you are truly ready to move on with your life, will he sense it, and respond to you. And yet, you CANNOT do it merely to GET a response out of him -- you have to do it for YOU, and be prepared for the consequences, including the possibility that he won't respond at all -- that's his decision to make.
