WAW - Very confused and devastated - pt 11

[confusedinpa]

You two do have a financial agreement in place from the lawyers?

No we don't. We had worked one out before she moved out but then she wouldn't sign it. Then we were working something out but then I lost my job so we waited. Shortly after I started working again, I found out what she had really been doing so we hadn't talked - last Friday was the first time

So in short no and my lawyer is pissed at me about that.

We do have a verbal one - doesn't do me much good I know

I've been mulling it over, and after getting with Stronger, I'm going to go with:

"If I had cheated on you and then filed divorce and left, how would you feel about lending me money?"

And go from there.

If it get's heated/emotional, I do like what you wrote - considering the situation, I have decided to keep finances seperate. Or I would just hang up.

Part of me had thought that not doing it would piss her off and we're back to where we were but then I realized that that was dumb. If I have to be worried about walking on eggshells when I'm standing up for one of my N.U.T.s then I don't want to be in a relationship with that person.

So if this drives her away from any more remorse or what not, so be it. While renewing the marriage relationship is something that I really want, I just don't see anyway where I will be happy with it. The reality is that it would not make me feel right to lend her the money, so why should I do something that I do not feel right about....

Perhap's that's what I should say to her.