A&K...great post. Coach, great post. Agree. Each time your wife has responded to you...whether by email, phone, etc, I think you are missing HUGE opportunities here. I don't mean opportunities to make a sudden miraculous intervention, but, little steps along the way to show strength, conviction and listening.

The email that you received re: church was an amazing opportunity to respond to, talk about poetic license. We talk about changing here on this forum...without trying to sell it to our LBS's. What a great stage for a powerful response.

alive and kicking was right in that your W was quite clear and eloquent about her feelings. Whether she is in MLC or not, there is nothing you can do to change her or control that but you have a wonderful opportunity now to show change IN YOU.

If she wants a D, you cannot do anything to stop her, so, if she has moved on, then you should too but in a way that you maintain your boundaries, be a great dad, yada yada and if you choose to do so, keep your back door open.

Finally, after reading your wife's emails, I suggest you take a peek at womensinfidelitydotcom. Read the intro. Digest it. I'd be curious to see if you find anything in that.

FIB

Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11)
Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t
Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10
Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;