Getting Un"Stuck" - Giving My Burden to God

[Hope4us]

Stuck, I know that's a kick in the groin, but like others have mentioned, it's not over yet if you still want to save your marriage.

My W threatened me with D mulitple times. Even sent me some financial disclosure paperwork to fill out so she could take it to her lawyer and they could plot the demise of our marriage.

I told her I would not fill the paperwork out. I told her if SHE wanted a divorce I would not help her in it's execution, but if she did file, that I would counter sue on the grounds of adultery and I would call her and OM to the stand so they could tell the whole world what has been going on. I also told her that S17 (16 at the time) was old enough to decide who he wanted to live with, but that I would do everything in my power to see that he'd live with me because he needed a stable parent in his life, and right now, she ain't it.

And that ended the D talk.

I could be totally off base here and if I am, there's still stuff you can do, but the way I see it, you called her on her crap and she didn't like it, so now she's threatening you with D.

I say, tell her if she wants a D, go ahead and file, but that you won't help her destroy your marriage. And if she files, you will do everything in your power to protect yourself and your kids. Then see what she does.

If she still goes ahead and files, get a lawyer (if you haven't already) and protect yourself and your kids. This might be what she thinks she wants right now, but these things take time and you can use that time to your advantage. If she thinks a D is going to make everything better for her, then let her see just what a D will be like. Do not give her A SINGLE PENNY more than the court orders. If you separate, DO NOT COMMUNICATE with her except where the kids are involved.

See, right now she's still in that dream world where she thinks life with OM would be all perfect. But the reality is, she knows NOTHING about him. You guys separate and she'll pursue that relationship. And when he has to meet all her needs, he'll fail. Is OM married? Have a GF? If so, she's going to put all kinds of pressure on him. See, I left my H just for you. He'll never be able to measure up to that.

And then, when that fails on her, she'll come limping back. And then you'll have a decision to make whether you want her or not.

Again, we are just outsiders here giving you advise based on our experiences and what we've observed. You have to decide how you want to play it.

Keep you chin up.