I can honestly say BDTD. Still doing that to a degree.
And when I read " but what doesn't make sense is that he would help out a stranger before he'd EVER help me. There was a woman driving with a hole in her tire the other day while we were together, He jumped at the opportunity to help her out..."
Have to say, that`s my H too! In fact he RESENTS having to help me.
Thats cos he`s in pain. He`s not happy. And because I`m the closest person to him in the whole wide world he is utterly convinced it`s all my fault.
Knowing that he`s wrong helps me not fixate on his anger, not let his anger get to me.
Knowing that its up to ME to keep me happy-and him to make himself happy , helps too.
But the biggest thing I did was set boundaries. I literally put my fingers in my ears and told H I`d listen IF he calmed down. I called him on his bad language too if he started to curse me.
Put up your boundaries Irish. Don`t get angry. Stay calm when you have to tell him what your limits are.
MLC is all about them being blind and selfish. Their heads are in the sand. They can`t see but can only lash blindly out at the nearest person.
So GLAD you got your own business. A little bit of independence for you.
And when you do get a break, take it all for YOU. Be good, kind,and indulgent of yourself. Love yourself. You`re the rock that`s keeping the family together.
