My Intro: Thanks for Reading!

[aliveandkicking]

RSF- You're a good guy.

[Stronger]

I agree.

[RedSoxFan]

That made me smile. Thanks to both of you. I think you're pretty amazing as well

[RedSoxFan]

So I've been on the forum for a month now, read the DR book right before I joined. I think I finally get the DBing methodology.

It's just retirement investing for dummies. No room for day trading or overnight get rich schemes. It's a long-term process requiring discipline and focus for a solid payoff in the future. Dollar cost averaging means that an occasional mistake or setback is fine as long as we remain steady and focused over time we will still achieve intended results.

There now, wasn't that easy. ;-)

[antlers]

So I've been on the forum for a month now, read the DR book right before I joined. I think I finally get the DBing methodology.

It's just retirement investing for dummies. No room for day trading or overnight get rich schemes. It's a long-term process requiring discipline and focus for a solid payoff in the future. Dollar cost averaging means that an occasional mistake or setback is fine as long as we remain steady and focused over time we will still achieve intended results.

There now, wasn't that easy. ;-)

That's a pretty good analogy! I would like to say that the payoffs though, are not only for the future. They are for the present also. You'll get a current 'good return' on your investment also!

[RedSoxFan]

That's a pretty good analogy! I would like to say that the payoffs though, are not only for the future. They are for the present also. You'll get a current 'good return' on your investment also!

That's a good point Antlers! The analogy does break a little there. We do get peace of mind with long-term investing but with DBing, if done right, there is a big near-term personal gain.

[Butterfly1]

God I hope so!!!

[RedSoxFan]

So I've been talking with a friend of W's over the last few days about my struggle to keep going in the current situation. Being married while W sees OM. Good guess that she was betraying my confidence. Just received the following email from W:

I've spent a lot of time thinking about things. Last weekend was particularly hard for me only to be topped off with some level of clarity at church, on Sunday.. The service was about living congruently and how living incongruently has a spiritual, emotional and physical cost.. This is absolutely true and is what has happened to me. I had processed the end of our marriage and was at peace with this. It is not what I wanted, initially, but I grew to accept it and realize it was for the best. You then come back into the picture and I find myself in a situation where I'm not single nor am I married. I am stuck in the middle of two very different lives and the two cannot coexist. Trying to live in this manner, incongruent to my beliefs, has caused a great deal of unhappiness for me and has taken me backwards in my growth and recovery. This has been bad for you, as well. You are stuck in the same limbo that I was last year and it is far worse than simply ending and accepting. This has been bad for us as parents because it has brought about a level of discomfort between us making it more difficult to deal with basic issues, much less complex issues, with respect to the care of our children. I have to take care of myself and live in a manner that I feel at peace and therefore I either needs to be single or married.... not both. For me our marriage ended a year ago and that feeling/belief has not changed for me and therefore I will move forward with the dissolution paperwork. I hope we can continue to co parent effectively and ultimately even better. I also hope that with time we can be a support to each other in whatever our new lives have in store for us. I have a great deal of respect for you and will always care deeply for you. I am so sorry for the hurt I have caused you over the past couple of months.
Pretty cowardly to deliver that in an email. I guess I'm inclined to go forward and end all of this crap. Any advice?

[aliveandkicking]

I'm sorry and I doubt I am the best to give you advice. However, I think you should basically say ok and that you accept her decision.

They are words on a page. Let her do it. See if she does it.

Have you seen a lawyer? If not, do that just to be prepared (although you seem pretty well informed already).

Breathe...she can move forward with this and you can still be the man you have worked hard to become.

I guess I'm inclined to go forward and end all of this crap.

What does this mean? Specifically as far as what you can do?

The "crap" doesn't end. You just take the necessary actions to take care of yourself.

[RedSoxFan]

I guess I'm inclined to go forward and end all of this crap.

What does this mean? Specifically as far as what you can do?

The "crap" doesn't end. You just take the necessary actions to take care of yourself.

It means give up fighting for the marriage and go take care of myself.

I'm sad