UPSIDE DOWN - still struggling, trying to detach

[Eskimo Nell]

I'm pretty confident that H will cool down Dudess. I didn't manage to 'act as if' at all ... it was just easy to be me and H to be H whilst we were talking about other stuff.

The minute he started to talk about a new life - moving interstate, changing jobs and all MLC stuff, I lost it! I evidently got his interest a few times as he told me that he would not discuss stuff if I continued to be 'cryptic'.

I just get so angry when he plays like a lawyer and demands yes or no answers only. He tells me that I have lied - constantly. I have not. I have been merely protecting myself and DB'ing! I haven't lied. He knows that I hate being called such and that's what rises my dander ... from there on in, I can't hold it together.

H twists words very cleverly, then makes out that it's my doing. It's so frustrating.

I thanked him tonight for all the jobs that he did here when we were together and I told him how hard I now realise that it was for him, with me giving him very little help. I really affirmed his position as a H and yet he totally rides roughshod on the sort of W that I have been - he belittles my efforts and even told me tonight that he thought that I was clinically depressed to have behaved the way I have in the past. I called him on that and said "good time to be a WAH then - I thought that our vows were in sickness and health - MINE were".

His usual comment sticks in my guts - "too little, too late - it's irreconcilable - it's dead, over, finished".

What's the point of DB'ing when someone is that done??