I am very sympathetic to your terrible plight.

But you are going to have to chill out and stop with the texting, and with the need to try and fix this mess.

I know your heart is in the right place but you are making the situation worse.

Your D14 is in need of some serious parenting.

Right now that would be my concern.

Be still, learn how to breathe and step back.

There can be no testimony without a test.
I am praying to go through this test and come out the other end with a new and better marriage then before.