Well, I am back here again. Husband and I separated last year, planned a reconciliation for this month and just a few weeks ago called it off. Feels like last year again.
I am disappointed and hurt. I am trying to deal with it. The hard part is that we work at the same place and see each other everyday. We seem to have strong feelings for one another but can't move forward from square one.
We were married three years ago. Spent the first two years arguing about my kids and his drinking. He has since stopped drinking and my kids are on their own. We enjoyed the summer,found we could talk things through without an argument, and began MC. MC is ok. But a few weeks ago we argued and he called off the move. After a week of being angry and not talking to me he recants. This time I admit that we are not ready and need more time. H decides to stay separated for another year and thinks that it is just not meant to be eventhough he would like to be with me.
I think he means what he says but has a lot of anger, resentments and doubts. He complains that it shouldn't be so hard. MC thinks we do a good job of pushing each other away and may just succeed in ending the M if we don't change our ways. Individually MC tells me that H is about as difficult as they come and it will take a lot of work for me to tolerate him. H will at times admit his problems are to blame for most of our M failure - but says that if I would learn to respond/react differently to his stuff that it would decrease significantly.
I don't know what to think at this point. We don't have much history, and if we didn't have a wonderful summer then I think we would be ending our M.
