I was supposed to get divorced tomorrow - part 2

[1853dave]

Monday PM I talk to the kids on the phone - eventually then the W. She tells me that D4 and D9 both get off of school on wed at 3:30 - and did I want to pick them up. I told her sure, as we usually spend time tigether on Wed anyway. Then she tells me not to take D9 somewhere and leave D4 behind at preschool. I say "What?!?" and she repeats her statement. I then say "What in the world are you talking about???" She was worried I was going to take D9 and leave D4 alone for a while. What in the heck is she talking about?!? I assured her that A) - I have no intention of leaving anybody anywhere, and B) I plan to pick them both up since their schools are literally right across the street from each other. I could not understand her crazy talk.

Yesterday late morning I get a call and e-mail from the atty's office - saying that they are scheduling mediation for us on the 28th (happens to be my 10 year anniversary - nice, huh?). I wasn't expecting this, but W's attorney I believe is driving the train on this. W is so darn passive, that her atty has her hooks in her and is guiding my W towards the D.

Anyway, last night the kids call me again, and eventually talk to the W again - and she sounds 100% great - and was conversive, like there was nothing happening. It was like it was back when all was good in the marriage! I don't get it.... So, we had a nice 5 or more minute chat on the phone, and that was that.

Wednesday - today - I see the DB counselor. We discuss the next step. I told her W was willing 2 weeks ago (right after the last bomb) to see the C to discuss things, like a parenting plan, and cooperating with some stuff. C suggested that perhaps a letter, carefully worded might be the thing that pulls at her heart at this point. She has seen this happen in counseling with my W, but now W refuses to go to counseling. So, the letter is probably the next best medium. She gave me some guidelines, which I think were helpful.

We discussed the remote chance that W would return to counseling. She asked how I felt about that, and I told her I wanted to ask, so we planned that.

So, after counseling, I called W right away (before she left for the day) - she sounded fine - in fact she didn't make it to the phone in time, but she called me back a minute later - so at least she wasn't totally avoiding me. I told her I got an e-mail from the atty office regarding mediation that Monday - and she said "yeah, I saw something about that..." (What?!? - was it really that incidental???) I told her that she suggested some time ago meeting with C to discuss things, maybe instead of going to mediation. She said she forgot about that (how convenient) and I told her I spoke with C today and she has time next week. I asked W to think about it, and she said she would. She then said she was afraid that the C and I would gang up on her and make her agree to things she doesn't want. I told her that would certainly not happen, as whatever gets decided upon will be reviewed by both attys and a mediator and then a judge... She still thinks (on the outside anyway) that I have my C "snowed" and that we will strongarm her into something that she doesn't want.

So, she was friendly on the phone, and I think the conv went ok. I asked her to let me know soon, so we can tell the C to schedule us. W then tells me that she has been thinking about how to split things up, and that she doesn't want to "screw me over." It was as though she was trying to provide me with some assurances... I just said "OK", and that was why I thought it a good idea to meet with C before going to the attorneys.

So, we'll see if she agrees to go.